Now I know

Almost 2 weeks ago I bought some mandarins and I ate one after a long time with out fruit (carbonhydrates) – but I couldn’t stop with just one! Had to eat more of them. I could stop tomorrow I thought! When we were out of mandarins I ate some potatoes and some bread and what happens to me?

Now I know! I get so damed sleepy! My bloodsugar raises sky high and then drops to the lowest of low! And I fall asleep – infront of the TV or the computer – no problem! I loose my focus – food gets on my mind but I have a hard time on finding out what to eat to dinner!

So what did I learn from this: I react to carbonhydrates if I get them every day that will say more than my 400g of vegstables a day.

Today I had to lie down for half an hour, fell asleep direct and now I get angry with my self: I actually knew that carbonhydrates has that effect on me so WHY did I do it????

I know the answer to that too: I’m an addict! I got a disease and I got to be on my guard not to act on it! And it is sad that I can’t be a normal person that can eat what ever I want!

It is very easy for me to recognize when I start to overeat, but the hard part is to recognize that I’m beeing taken over by the food again! The need to sleep again just after 4 hours awake made me realize that fact!

I don’t want to be a slave to food, I want to be ME! And I wont give up fighting for my life as a healthy person! NEVER GIVE UP my father tought me! Now it’s time to listen to my body and stop this madness!

One of my goals is to be nicely dressed when I graduate the 28th of May 2010 – and yesterday I found a jacket I would love to wear that day.  I will think of this jacket everytime I think of food – knowing that I will not be able to wear it if I eat carbonhydrates!


2 thoughts on “Now I know”

  1. Hang in there Mette! You can do it! Imagine yourself in that jacket, receiving your degree with a very proud Hans and Linnea watching- but one day at a time!! Long journeys begin with a single step!
    Love to you all!!

  2. Hej Skat.
    Jeg ved næsten ikke, hvad jeg skal sige, og det ved jeg jo godt alligevel.
    Jeg føler så meget med dig, det er så pokkers at du altid skal tænke på dit problem, men du har nu i ca. ½ år bevist at nu er stærk. Du kan godt, og godt at du tænker på fars ord til dig. Jeg vil også så gerne hjælpe dig !!
    Den meget smukke jakke, den skal du ha’ på den 28. maj 2010, og hvis jeg må, skal det blive en gave fra mig.
    Masser af kærlige knus fra din mor.

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