Over a period of time I have got a lot of criticism for the way I live, eat, raise and feed my daughter. All on facebook and all by one family (3 adults with 3 biological children).  As of today the friendship is over and I sit here with an odd feeling of relief and sadness.  I have know 2 of these people for 12 years or so.

I have suspected that it would end one day since our talk about infertility back in the beginning  of 2007. Hans and I had our papers in China, and I was “pregnant” (adoption language) with our Chinese child.

Our friends asked if there were any chance for us to have a biological child, and we said no. Then he said: “But if you did, miracles happens, the you could say Fuck You! to the Chinese!”

And I answered: “NO! I would be very sad if I became pregnant now! I would mourn my Chinese child I never would have!”

He didn’t understand that and I said: “Then you value bio-children higher than adopted children!” and he answered: “Yes I do!”

That day I promised my self that if anything from him or his family showed me that they had something against my child I would end the friendship.

When we finally knew who we had been waiting for for so many years, they didn’t bother to comment on my power point show I mailed to our friends and family. When we finally talked on the phone and I said that Hans was going to be a father he asked if I was pregnant? So I asked if he hadn’t seen the power point? And his comment was – “ohh Yes she’s sweet.”

Now Linnea is here and is our daughter, and this family keeps coming back with negative comments on my behavior with words about that it’s bad for Linnea. They have been rude, coming with small hints like “if I had had a baby…… I would know” etc. Always Linnea is mentioned Enough is enough.

I don’t need them in my life and wouldn’t call it friendship. And I surely don’t want Linnea to grow up around such people.

I probably should have ended it long ago, but I thought that meeting our daughter and seeing us with her would change them, but no and now I give up on them. May they live happy in their world!

I will cherish my real friends so much more. I have met so many wonderful people all over the world and I will keep you in my heart!

5 thoughts on “Friends”

  1. Sometimes you just have to make these hard decisions. I think this is a good one though!!! Anybody that would not regard Linnea YOUR child is just plain stupid!!!

  2. Hi, everybody! I just want to say that I could not be happier to know that the little girl I sponsored has been adopted by such loving parents!!!! Money well spent!!!!!!!!!I am thrilled every time I look at the calendar. Love to you all!! ;o)

  3. Ta inte åt dig av skit!
    Linnea har väl fått världens bästa föräldrar i er – därför att hon var ämnade för er från början.
    Linnea är en riktigt fin och välartad dotter. Ni har haft tur, hon har haft tur att ni fick varandra!
    Lycka till!

  4. Mette vad tråkigt för dom som inte kan förstå er kärlek till Er Linnea.
    Jag vet i allafall att hade jag inte fått mina alldeles egna barn från Kina så hade jag också sörjt dom.
    Jag vet också att ni är lyckliga alla 3 tillsammans och jag tycker det är jättekul att få alla dina uppdateringar om vad som händer i era liv där självklart Linnea tar en stor plats.
    Kram till er allihopa

  5. Selvfølgelig, Mette, vil jeg / mormor også give udtryk for, hvad jeg føler for jer og jeres dejlige barn Linnea, – mit barnebarn.
    Det har været en lykke også for mig at “få” hende. At det er “adoptionsmormor” er jeg så glad og stolt over, hun har beriget mit liv !!!
    Et barn er et barn, uanset hvor i verden det er blevet født. I er en dejlig lille familie, som alle tre elsker hinanden, det ved jeg !!
    Og jeg har jo lige haft et lille “feriebarn” hos mig i København, Det har været en skøn oplevelse, og både Linnea og jeg har hygget os, for VI elsker også hinanden !!
    Kærlige knus fra Mor / mormor.

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